The Slander and Besmirchment of ACME Products Corporation

July 25, 2010

Someone on TopTenz.net recently posted a(nother) Top 10 Fictional Fictional Brands from Movies and TV list, which included Morleys, Big Kahuna Burger, and so on. At the end of the list was ACME, and here’s what the strident blogger had to say about this company:
There is no more culturally famous fake company than Acme, [...]

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Goldslick and Binyon’s

July 20, 2010

You know, I heard from my cousin Walter that the tiny flakes of gold in Goldslick Vodka lacerate your throat on the way down – allowing the alcohol to enter your bloodstream directly. Also, did you know that every can of Old Muskogee beer is packed with extra air pressure for more effective “shotgunning”?

Okay, [...]

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Demakes Roundup

July 7, 2010

Down-conversion is running rampant on the World Wide Webs, lately. It seems as if everyone is getting a kick out of trying to squeeze the present through the filter of the past.
Here are some Atarified anachronisms from the now defunct The-Minusworld.com:

For those experiencing double déjà vu, you’re not going slowly insane – we actually [...]

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Nails, Mooby’s, and Buddy Christ

July 6, 2010

An abundance of inside jokes and references weave together the movies that fall within Kevin Smith’s View Askewniverse canon. Films like Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, and Dogma drop allusions to unseen characters (like “Cousin Walter”, who met an undignified demise) or feature similar pop culture conversations (as in the inordinate amount of Burt Reynolds-centric [...]

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NART News

July 6, 2010

Been a bit busy lately, but more content is underway. In the meantime:

Not a Real Thing was recently featured in Argentina’s newspaper, Clarín. You can read the article in English (sort of) or Spanish. Thanks to Nicolás Artusi for the interest, and the thoughtful questions.
I’ll be speaking on a panel at Geekend [...]

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CINCO Roundup

July 2, 2010

Rich Shivener from Topless Robot beat me to the punch on this one, so rather than shamelessly steal his content, I’ll just shamefully link to it:
Read 8 Great CINCO Products from Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job

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May Cause Follicle Necrosis

July 1, 2010

While we’re on a Fallout 3 kick, I’ll point out some more examples of fixation on the game’s branded power-ups. Chris Furniss from Weekly Geek created meatspace versions of his favorite in-game accoutrements in order to add a bit of flair to his nerdy cosplay habit:

Nuka-Cola caps: The post-apocalyptic currency [...]

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Strontium and Pomegranate

June 29, 2010

Here’s an example of brand fiction as a subset of fan fiction. 17-year-old Ken F from Arizona is part of a community of PC gamers who modify the original game code and graphics in order to incorporate their own creative vision into the experience. The modders will alter the game’s avatar, give themselves [...]

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UnCoke Roundup

June 26, 2010

A.  Real Soda, art piece by Ashley Anderson
B. Flazzle, prop soda by Earl Hays Press
C. Cocola, prop soda by Schein Berlin
D. Coca-Cobra, trading card from Wacky Packages
E.  Power Up, from Bad Dudes – NES version
F.  Power Up, from Bad Dudes – arcade version
G.  Cola, prop soda by Earl Hays Press
H.  Nuka-Cola, from Fallout 3
I don’t [...]

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Blammo! Marketing (or Not a Real Selling Point)

June 23, 2010

When Blammo! released Log in the United States, they launched an infectious ad campaign that quickly took the nation by storm. If you haven’t already seen this commercial, be warned: This song will not leave your brain for a long, long time.

The jingle for Log contains all of the product’s selling points:

Bigness
Heaviness
Woodenness
Goodness

Okay, so [...]

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Bacon Baby

June 22, 2010

While we’re on the subject of pork-related April Fools’ Day product releases, I thought I’d bring up Bacon Baby Infant Formula – a product with miraculous benefits:
By the age of 4 months, our test subject started to exhibit some amazing abilities including walking and talking. By 6 months of age, she could read and memorize [...]

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